And If I Asked You…

“And if I asked you to name all the things you love, how long would it take for you to name yourself?”

Think about that question.

We’ve all been asked to name some things we love, whether it was an introduction in a classroom or on a first date. Normally, most of us say things such as our children, our spouse, our families, a hobby, or a certain color. Maybe we’ll say our car that we named or our favorite comfy t-shirt. When I was asked this, not that long ago, my list went: my children, my husband, my family, my pets, and my best friends… and that was it. I never thought to answer with “myself.”

Truth is, I don’t love myself. Not yet. I’ve been at war with myself, with who I am, for many years.

I’ve struggled with my weight. I would go through periods of time where I would lose 60-80 pounds through diet changes and changes in my activity level then I’d gain it all back. Right now, five days after having my son, I’m somewhere around 310 pounds. I’d love to lose about 110 pounds; maybe even a little more. It’s on my goal list.

I’ve struggled with my mental health. Granted, I have gone from suicidal 17-year-old to surviving 27-year-old. But, to me, merely surviving isn’t enough. I want to be able to say “I am happy with where I’m at in life.” I want to finish my degree(s), be financially stable, live somewhere I truly love, etc. I want to raise happy and healthy children.

I’m hoping that by taking steps to fix the little things, I’ll learn to love my life as well as myself.

I’m curious, if I were to ask you the question from this post, would you remember to name yourself? Leave a comment below.

Where are you in your “love yourself” journey?

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